So my last post covered the first part of the last day, several emotional events dealing with first hand racism. We are still trying to figure out what went wrong with the rent, I do not know if we will ever figure that out.
I can not tell you how strange it is to by typing on my "normal" computer with no ticking time limit at the top of the screen.
The last evening was full of tears. We went out to dinner and "our" five Haitian boys came with us. They played on a playground while we ate and a few gringos tried their singing talents with karaoke. After eatting I found Luis in the back of the playground silently crying. I teared up immediately and just hugged him. I knew there was no comforting, how can the sad cheer the sad? Luis and I both began sobbing. We had become such buds. I thought of all the memories. Coloring with him the first few days he was too timid to write. Watching the intelligance of an 11 year old unfold as he wrote and completed simple math. Daily walks around Puerto Plata. His embrassment as I sang "Buttercup" at the top of my lungs on the Malacon. Reciting lines from the Lion King with him, he was always Rafiki. I couldn't believe I was leaving him- to live alone on the streets. He was my Haitian brother, my friend and my teacher. From that moment on a I was a mess for the rest of the night. I was not alone, gringos and Haitians we crying together. I was thankful to Luis to cry himself to sleep, it took away some of the pain.
Enso, our 19 year old Haitian friend/student, cried with me for a long time. I think we both had headaches and were dehydrated by the end. The sarrow had no end. I cried until my eyeballs hurt and the skin around my eyes was red and swollen. I cried on and off for two days.
I still tear up, I miss my family in the Dominican. I have heard from Luis a couple of times. I was furious he spent money on a phone call- he has no money. I loved hearing his voice and knowing he would survive. One time I answered the phone and the first thing I heard was " Rafiki will show you the way!" I loved it!!!
Life in the United States is weird. I forgot that toilets work, that hot showers exist, and that I also had a life here too! I did not realize how much I changed. It was all new in the DR, so there was nothing to compare too. My life here fits me differently. I feel like I have grown so much, more than I know I think. I think it will take a few weeks to settle in and find my place in this world again. I am not the same and my life will never be the same.
I find myself thinking about what I can do here for the Dominican. Just talking about it has brought some results. I have a few more ideas cultivating and will relieve more as they have more of a frame work.
Life is powerful, and the will to survive exists; I just want to nurture that will.
I can not tell you how strange it is to by typing on my "normal" computer with no ticking time limit at the top of the screen.
The last evening was full of tears. We went out to dinner and "our" five Haitian boys came with us. They played on a playground while we ate and a few gringos tried their singing talents with karaoke. After eatting I found Luis in the back of the playground silently crying. I teared up immediately and just hugged him. I knew there was no comforting, how can the sad cheer the sad? Luis and I both began sobbing. We had become such buds. I thought of all the memories. Coloring with him the first few days he was too timid to write. Watching the intelligance of an 11 year old unfold as he wrote and completed simple math. Daily walks around Puerto Plata. His embrassment as I sang "Buttercup" at the top of my lungs on the Malacon. Reciting lines from the Lion King with him, he was always Rafiki. I couldn't believe I was leaving him- to live alone on the streets. He was my Haitian brother, my friend and my teacher. From that moment on a I was a mess for the rest of the night. I was not alone, gringos and Haitians we crying together. I was thankful to Luis to cry himself to sleep, it took away some of the pain.
Enso, our 19 year old Haitian friend/student, cried with me for a long time. I think we both had headaches and were dehydrated by the end. The sarrow had no end. I cried until my eyeballs hurt and the skin around my eyes was red and swollen. I cried on and off for two days.
I still tear up, I miss my family in the Dominican. I have heard from Luis a couple of times. I was furious he spent money on a phone call- he has no money. I loved hearing his voice and knowing he would survive. One time I answered the phone and the first thing I heard was " Rafiki will show you the way!" I loved it!!!
Life in the United States is weird. I forgot that toilets work, that hot showers exist, and that I also had a life here too! I did not realize how much I changed. It was all new in the DR, so there was nothing to compare too. My life here fits me differently. I feel like I have grown so much, more than I know I think. I think it will take a few weeks to settle in and find my place in this world again. I am not the same and my life will never be the same.
I find myself thinking about what I can do here for the Dominican. Just talking about it has brought some results. I have a few more ideas cultivating and will relieve more as they have more of a frame work.
Life is powerful, and the will to survive exists; I just want to nurture that will.
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