Reflection on the Last Day from the USA

So my last post covered the first part of the last day, several emotional events dealing with first hand racism. We are still trying to figure out what went wrong with the rent, I do not know if we will ever figure that out.

I can not tell you how strange it is to by typing on my "normal" computer with no ticking time limit at the top of the screen.

The last evening was full of tears. We went out to dinner and "our" five Haitian boys came with us. They played on a playground while we ate and a few gringos tried their singing talents with karaoke. After eatting I found Luis in the back of the playground silently crying. I teared up immediately and just hugged him. I knew there was no comforting, how can the sad cheer the sad? Luis and I both began sobbing. We had become such buds. I thought of all the memories. Coloring with him the first few days he was too timid to write. Watching the intelligance of an 11 year old unfold as he wrote and completed simple math. Daily walks around Puerto Plata. His embrassment as I sang "Buttercup" at the top of my lungs on the Malacon. Reciting lines from the Lion King with him, he was always Rafiki. I couldn't believe I was leaving him- to live alone on the streets. He was my Haitian brother, my friend and my teacher. From that moment on a I was a mess for the rest of the night. I was not alone, gringos and Haitians we crying together. I was thankful to Luis to cry himself to sleep, it took away some of the pain.

Enso, our 19 year old Haitian friend/student, cried with me for a long time. I think we both had headaches and were dehydrated by the end. The sarrow had no end. I cried until my eyeballs hurt and the skin around my eyes was red and swollen. I cried on and off for two days.

I still tear up, I miss my family in the Dominican. I have heard from Luis a couple of times. I was furious he spent money on a phone call- he has no money. I loved hearing his voice and knowing he would survive. One time I answered the phone and the first thing I heard was " Rafiki will show you the way!" I loved it!!!

Life in the United States is weird. I forgot that toilets work, that hot showers exist, and that I also had a life here too! I did not realize how much I changed. It was all new in the DR, so there was nothing to compare too. My life here fits me differently. I feel like I have grown so much, more than I know I think. I think it will take a few weeks to settle in and find my place in this world again. I am not the same and my life will never be the same.

I find myself thinking about what I can do here for the Dominican. Just talking about it has brought some results. I have a few more ideas cultivating and will relieve more as they have more of a frame work.

Life is powerful, and the will to survive exists; I just want to nurture that will.

Rough Day for Gringos

So today is was our last day with the boys and so much happened. All of us experienced racism in some manner. I was left at the house by myself with the boys and China, our cook. Bernard, a friend of Project Esperanza came over with his art. I was playing with the boys and all the sudden I come to find that Bernard and China are in a heated debate about the Haitians in the DR. I did not know what to do or say, I just let them battle. I sent the boys to the concha down the street to play. Nicoris, China's niece, often plays at the house and was there today. But today she began to beg to me for money. I was like "what do you want the money for?" She wanted new shoes. We had given the boys shoes that were donated by various people and brought to the DR from the USA with the purpose of being given to the Haitian boys we teach. Nicoris wanted me to give her some of those shoes and I was like ask Caitlina, which she had apparently done and gotten a negative response. I was so glad when Padre Rafiel showed up and I could speak with him and ignore the rest of the house guests. It was a lot for me to handle. But the other gringos were dealing with racism and illiness in other parts of Puerto Plata.

I don't know the details on this next story, but one of our Haitian boys is being robbed of his house, in which we already paid the rent on. I will write more as a I know more- right now there are no clear facts and lots of passionate feelings flowing.

Another one of our boys in the hospital possibly with a tumor. Again, I will write more when I know more.

It has been quite the finally here in the DR.

Finished with the school

We finished the work we had planned for this trip on Suzanna's school. We fixed water leakage problems, put a coating of latex waterproof paint on the entire inside and outside and got the windows put on. YAY! It is looking great, the boys may be able to start school there soon, how great that would be for them.

I am still working on learning the Dominican way, it is a bit different than American logic. It seems frequently symptoms are treated rather than the problem. It takes a lot for us gringos to get what is seen as the solution. I do appreciate the daily siesta though.

Time is flying by here, and so much has happened. Tomorrow is my last full day with the boys and then on Friday we have a half day with them. Our flight leaves at 6am on Saturday morning, so it is looking like we will have to catch a taxi at midnight on Friday and spend the night in the airport. Many more adventures are ahead, and I am pumped.

Boys will be boys

So having a house full of boys during the day often brings about conflict. Boys naturally tend to wrestle and such, but with they enviroment they are brought up in it seems to frequently turn into more, than well is necessary. This trip is a trial trip for things like this and I love the ways we are solving issues that arise. We have two large whiteboard with schedules of the day posted and various posters reminding them of the rules and responsiblities of each person. The boys are so cute, they love to be like the gringo boys. Louis always wants to jump in and help them build or work on the school. I think it is great for the gringo guys to be here, they serve as a super male role model. The girls have become quite maternal, especially towards the little ones. I love to see our Esperanza family form. One man on the street questioned us by saying "A black and white family?" I thought yeah, that is right we are a family.

I am exhausted, yet empowered. Many hugs from here in the DR.

Humbled by the Toilet

Ever since Nathaniel left Noah, Thomas and I have been in charge of the water and household maintenance, including the toilets. The water is a constant challenge; our drinking water is deliver in 5 gallon jugs and all other water comes in the water truck. The water truck fills up a cistern, it costs 10 dollars for a truck. We have 4 cisterns. 3 on the ground- 1 collects rain water, 1 is filled up by the truck and the 3rd is connected to the pump and the 4th is on the roof. Apparently they were all once connect to the pump, but currently only one is. So the one that the truck fills up has to be drained in the tank connected to the pump. The pump then has to pump the water to the roof tank so that we have water pressure via gravity. It is the Dominican way, it seems to make things more complicated than necessary. It is also common for the pump not to work. Noah, Thomas and I spent over an hour working on fixing the pump today. A computer guy, chemical engineer and a nutrition major trying to be a plumber. But i feel useful and the knowledge is good to have since I will be here so long this summer.

The toilets are a whole other story- yuck! I have been so humbled by these things. Noah, Thomas and I have had to fix the toilets. Here in the DR one can not flush toilet paper down the toilet, so it is thrown away. Water is precious and expensive so we only flush well... we have a little rhyme "if it is yellow let is be mellow, if it is brown go on and flush it down." So any problem with the toilet is going to be horrifically disgusting. Hopefully a real plumber is coming soon because I have had to fix it at least once a day for the past 3 days- delightful. I just try to keep thinking that knowledge of toilets will be helpful in the future and my stomach has gotten a little stronger.

The boys are as incredible as ever. I worked with them on math a lot today. The tough thing about basic multiplication is it is just memorization. Sometimes they get frustrated, but nothing a few words of affirmation cannot cure.

We got kicked off the concha (basketball court) a couple of times because it is Haitians and gringos. Noah also paid to take us out to lunch yesterday and the restaurant staff was very racist and tried to pull some tricks- luck for us we have some strong willed volunteers. The boys get embarrassed about it but then just love it we, the gringos, stick it to the Dominicans. Not all Dominicans are racist though, we have met plenty of ones who work to help the Haitians. The little boys also stick up for us females when some guy makes a comment. For example, some guy asked Carrie to marry him, Amillio responded she doesn´t want to marry a Dominican she wants to marry a Haitian. We all loved it.

If feel like we are giant family, just with no common blood lines. It is heartwarming and makes up for the less than pleasant toilet adventures.

That´s all for now, love from the Dominican.

Some Personal Thoughts

*grrr... my last entry didn't get posted*

I have grown some much in just a week's time. Here I have felt so much love. The little boys have given me more than they know and I feel more than I give to them. I came to give and I now have received. Life is a paradox it seems. I have learned so much about joy. Joy not happiness. Joy is a feeling from God, to have joy in the Lord can be constant. These little boys have that joy, and they have nothing. Louis has worn the same clothes every single day and he sleeps secretly on the porch of a Dominican house, yet he smiles and laughs and plays as soon as the opportunity arises. He is not bitter, he does not beg (to us)- he lives and is grateful. I cannot image I would be able to do that at the age of ten. I was probably crying to my parents begging them for some toy. I know I will struggle to accurately portray these boys, these little men. I knew their situation before I came, in fact I heard about it for a semester. I still did not understand and feel it in my heart until I saw it. No picture can capture this trip, no words can describe these feelings. I have cried out of joy, out of overwhelming feelings several times on this trip. Phillip, who is 6 and working, has given me gum and candy several times. Other boys do the same. I have been drawing with them and then they will later surprise me with a drawing they did on their own. I love to learn from them their card games, so different rules of soccer, but more than anything I want to learn to immitate their constant joy and giving spirit.

I have so much I want to do for this summer, for this life. I cannot give enough of myself to these boys. I will need to reflect on what I most want to accomplish for this summer. I cannot wait to do more. I have never been so sure of something, my purpose is to serve and love. Right now I feel I can best be used here. Caitlin is so supportive and just all around wonderful. I want to express all my ideas now, but I think I should first process and reflect. I do know that God has planned for me an epic and wonderful life. Trials here are constant, but with each new victory I feel like I am closer to the Lord and receive blessing. From those blessing come responsiblities and more trials, but I can do it- I know I can. I was created for this life.

Church today was amazing. It was 3 hours long, Spencer would joke on me for enjoying 3 hours of church, but it was so empowering. The church was in a tiny little building. I felt like it was a fort I would have created when I was in elementary school, the difference was the honor of the people. They were their for one purpose. It was very open and everyone did their personal prayers aloud. The sermon was in Spanish, but with some help I understood it. The message was patience. How we must be patient, God is not on our time. I teared up several times, I needed to hear it. Everyone was loving and kind and focused on God. I feel right now as if God has given me golden wings to fly with. I pray for the feeling this love to be reflected off of me and to everyone here and at home.

Grrr... time is almost out again and I dont want to loose another entry. Peace and joy from the DR.

Update for January 3rd and 4th

Oh my goodness! So very much happens everyday that writing for two days seems overwhelming. Julie and I have been to the medical clinic twice. We spend the mornings there and then work with the kids after lunch. The clinic is an a clinic that works with patients who have HIV and AIDS. We sat in on a consultation today and the poor woman was just a mess. She appeared at first fine, Dominicans take a great deal of pride in their appearance. We then found out that she had cyrosis (I am sure that is incorrectly spelled), Hep. C. and HIV. She cannot be given all the medicine she needs to relieve the pain, because her liver cannot handle it. She was an alcoholic, apparently is now sober. We learned there are about 2000 people with HIV in the DR. 92% of the adults with AIDS contract it through sexual relations. 17,000 childern approximately are born with HIV and only 150 of them are receiving good care. 150 are living with parents who have the disease. For such a small country these numbers are huge. We (Julie and I) are teaching one of the health center employees English- should be interesting.

The kids are great. Today we took them to the Malicon (boardwalk). It was the first time in a long time they could act like children in public. The tourist police harassed them, but could only say so much since they were with four gringas. The boys loved how safe they felt with us. I did worry about running into their bosses, fortunately we did not. Some of these boys are six or ten years old and living basically on their own (no family) and working. I have been coloring with them frequently. The task of properly holding a marker is difficult for some. They are quickly learning to let their imaginations run wild. Playing cards are a blessing for teaching math- I hope to bring back more this summer.

I worked on Suzanna´s school yesterday. Hopefully windows will be put in tomorrow- but who knows when you are on Dominican time.

I have had my hair in cornrows the past three days- super idea. China, the cook, has a cousin who has done it twice for me now. I currently I have beads in them. It is so much cooler and since I am working on day 3 with no shower, it keeps my hair neat.

I wish I had more time to write about the culture, but alas.

So long from the DR.

First Day

The first day has past and I am half way throught the second. No bug bites to complain about and just slightly tired. I wend about 40 hours with only two one hour naps. Last night a cold shower and bed never felt so good. The house is great and Puerto Plata is an interesting site. The mountains in the background are breath taking, but seem to be fake because at your feet there is trash. The beach is littered with trash. I don't mean a few cans, I mean dead dogs and every thing else.

The boys are so inspiring though. I spent time playing soccer with them yesterday and making up my own version of baseball. Today I work with a little boy named Louis. I would draw and he would copy my stick pictures. Then we moved on to letters. I have learned one of their card games and taught them War, tonight some of us might teach them Spoons. Some of the other group members read to them in Creole and taught them Spanish. The other half of the group worked on the school. There is more work to be done on the school than we originally thought.

Tomorrow I will spend half of the day at a medical clinic shadowing a doctor. I am excited and I am sure will be amazed at all I see.

I feel like I am learning a great deal about the culture and the needs. I am also learning the value of taking quiet time to spend with God. I think my heart and mind would be so overwhelmed if I hadn't. Time here at the internet cafe is about to run out, so long for now.